He is Risen!

“and said to them, "Thus it is written, that the Christ should suffer and on the third day rise from the dead, and that repentance and forgiveness of sins should be proclaimed in his name to all nations, beginning from Jerusalem. You are witnesses of these things.”

‭‭Luke‬ ‭24:46-48‬ ‭ESV‬‬

He is Risen! 

Happy Easter!

The Way, The Truth, The Life, The Love

Definition of Tough

Today was tough. The hubs and I had a very deep discussion about my faith the other night and I truly felt moved by our conversation. Having the ability to have someone in this life that allows you to open up to them about your faith, and not just speak about your walk with God, but bare your soul to them. Talk about your aspirations, your hopes, your vision for this life and some of the most inner thoughts of your spirit man. To be able to be that vulnerable with another human is a magical thing. It's a gift. And I'm thankful I have that with my husband.
Well;...the devil heard me. He heard me and it rattled his world so much that he has been coming after me for the past two days. You see, I consider myself to be a "recovering-depressionist" I feel for the past year or so I've slowly been sinking into depression. I have lost interest, gone silent, not cared, about anything; I mean anything...and cried silently...a lot. But I've also had a movement and have been working on my choices. I know I have a choice to either continue to let the devil takeover or to stand up and fight. I'm choosing to fight. I can beat this, I don't have to be this person. I don't have to be a fragile, weak, individual that is afraid to live life. I have decided that God wins. He is the true ruler of my life. But sometimes it's hard to remember that.
Tonight I had another meltdown. I ended up in the bathroom in a puddle of tears. Why?? Not sure why; I just know it happened. (I'm praying through that) I found myself consumed of awful sad thoughts. But then I remembered a sermon I listened to yesterday; and it was about being thankful. So instead of wallowing, I decided to thank God. For everything. I thanked Him for this life, for my children, for my health, for their health, for our jobs, for the ability to provide more than abundantly for them, and for peace over my spirit. And you know what;...God won. I immediately felt His presence. I felt peace and picked myself up.
So yes; today was tough, and I'm sure I'll have more tough days. But my God is tougher.

Choices

It's been a year...a whole stinkin' year almost to the day. (t-minus 7 days) My family has grown closer, thank you God. I have been promoted to Supervisor of my department; thank you God. My marriage is better than it's ever been; thank you God. Overall, things are great. I've just been tired. My spirit has been tired. We recently had a family vacation and it was great. We got away and disconnected from the hustle and bustle of our everyday. It was nice to re-charge.  I felt refreshed and felt my soul awaken in a way it hasn't in a very long time. It made me realize how far I allowed myself to get sucked into the whirlwind of life. While I am appreciative of the opportunity God has given me, I have been extremely challenged in ways I've never been before in my life. Having two small children and a very demanding job plus looking sane all at the same time is hard. The word "hard" honestly doesn't do it justice; I have felt like I've been drowning for the past year. Attempting to maintain friendships, stay on top of tasks at work, stay available to my family, and hold my household together all while keeping a smile on my face. Thinking about it now makes me want to cry a little.
Being away for the weekend reminded me how important it is to take a step back every once in a while and breath. Not just breath but take a moment and dive into the Word. Remember God's promises to me that He will never forsake me or leave me, that if I give all of my anxiety to Him and focus on things that are positive, beautiful,  and pure it will bring a spirit of contentment and gratitude which in turn, brings peace. "Whatever you have learned or received or heard from me, or seen in me- put it into practice. And the God of peace will be with you." Philippians 4:9.
Ultimately, I've made a choice. I've made the choice to not let this life overcome me, but instead to give it to God and let the light of His Word and His Love overcome my world. This life may be trying, and it may have obstacles, but it's a beautiful life that was granted to me as a gift. He placed me here to do a work, a work to spread His message and His love to the people. I cannot do that if I'm focusing on the negative. I will choose to dive into Him and by doing so, others will see Him through me and that in itself, is the greatest gift of all.